Skip to main content

He is with me - a reflection from Kelsi Drake

Recently, I was reading the story of when an angel of the Lord comes to Gideon and tells him that he is going to save the Israelites from the hands of Midian, whom they had been oppressed by after their own rebellion against God. The angel says to Gideon “The LORD is with you, O mighty man of valor. Gideon responds by answering “Please sir, if the LORD is with us, why has all this happened to us? And where are all his wonderful deeds that our fathers recounted to us, saying, ‘Did not the LORD bring us up from Egypt? But now the LORD has forsaken us and given us into the hand of Midian.” (Judges 6) I thought about that interaction for days. At first, I thought it was Gideon’s boldness to immediately point out his disappointment and doubt when he encountered an angel of the Lord. However, after I reflected on it more, I realized this section stood out to me because I so often ask God the same question. “If you’re the good God I have heard about, and who I believe I follow, why is this happening?” Without wanting to admit it, I’d been asking God this question even over the past few weeks as I saw so much hurt, sadness, and brokenness surrounding me with COVID-19. Why would a good God allow so much pain? I don’t pretend to have the full answer to that question. I know there are aspects of God and His character that I am not going to understand this side of Heaven. I also know that The Bible tells us that the whole creation has been groaning as in the pains of childbirth (Romans 8:22) and that death and disease are a product of the Fall. However, I still feel the tension- why God? In the midst of this pandemic, I’ve been meditating on Psalm 23 along with so many of you. Verse 4 has been standing out to me and I’ve repeated it to myself over and over, even putting it up on our mantle as a daily reminder. “Even though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil, for you are with me. When I feel confusion and chaos, this is something I can cling to- He is with me! While I don’t know what the future holds with this virus (or anything for that matter) or “why” it’s happening, I can rest in the fact that God sees me, he knows me, and he is with me. He is in the midst of our brokenness, our rebellion, and our pain. He is in the midst of COVID-19. While I don’t fully understand His ways, I know that he is with me. And He is good.

Kelsi and her husband, Stephen, have been members of Northside for six years, and she joined our staff team as the Director of Operations in summer 2019. She particularly loves how known and cared for she feels by those at NCR, and the way they have become dear family. 

Comments

  1. NikkiApril 16, 2020 at 6:25 AM

    Thank you, Kelsi! This is so encouraging! I have likewise been encouraged this week by the very center of Psalm 23: "... You are with me..." the moment David changes from speaking the LORD's praises to others to speaking directly TO the LORD. It moves me how that displays David's overflowing emotions of love, praise, and gratitude about and towards the LORD. Praise God the He is a God who is WITH us, regardless of where we are! (Psalm 139, particularly verses 7 - 10)

    ReplyDelete

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

The ARC of Racial Justice - a Reflection and Exhortation from Pastor Matt Lorish

Here we are again. The video footage of Ahmaud Arbery is all over social media. It is a time for lament and a time for righteous anger. I write this blog post as a continuation to the initial posts offered by Northside Church members. My aim in this post is to help my fellow white brothers and sisters think about where we go from here. At the close of Jemar Tisby’s book, The Color of Compromise , he introduces a framework that he calls the A.R.C. of racial justice. Using Jemar’s framework, I’d like to humbly offer some application points that I think are important for me and my fellow white sisters and brothers at Northside Church to move towards. I also write this as a Christian pastor. Christians of all ethnicities are Bible people. The end-game for us isn’t just racial justice. The end-game for us is conformity to Jesus and honoring Him. Racial injustice is one of the areas in which we need God’s Spirit to change us, grow us and conform us (Rom 12:2, 2 Cor 3:18). My prayer is
1 comment
Read more

What is This? - A reflection by Christine Bor

“What is this?”, I demand, frustrated that God would allow this. “What is this?”, I cry, in anguish that God would allow this. “What is this?”, I sigh, exhausted that God would allow this. What is this thing that disrupts me from my day, my life, my comfort, my routine? What is this thing that once again disproportionately affects marginalized communities who have experienced the systemic oppression of food and housing insecurity and healthcare inequality for centuries? What is this thing that exposes and highlights the compounding of racial disparities and blatant prejudices? Manna is manhu, which in Hebrew translates to “What is this.” It’s an honest and brutal question. The Israelites were starving in the desert and when God gave them something to eat, they had the audacity to ask, “What is this?” But here I see the same audacity creep into my heart, my thoughts, my prayers. I question everything He places in my life and instead question, “What is this? How dare you
3 comments
Read more

His face was set for Jerusalem, so we can choose suffering too

My heart was arrested and blessed as I received my sister's prayer request this morning and saw her covered-up body (but sure-can't-cover-it-up glory). As is so often the case, she reminded me of our veiled-in-flesh Jesus. When she set out for Stanford, I wonder how excited those were who knew her. I wonder if they imagined how she might use that crown. What fame, what riches, what glory might follow. As He set out for Jerusalem, I wonder how excited those were who knew him. I wonder if they imagined how He might use that crown. What fame, what riches, what glory might follow. It was no mistake that He found Himself in Jerusalem. His face was set for it. To pay the penalty for our sins, to die while rescuing. He knew all along why he was going and what it would cost him. But we were worth it to Him. It was no mistake that she found herself with Covid patients today. Her face was set for it. Because He did what He did for her, she can risk while rescuing. S
5 comments
Read more